“I Love Female Orgasm” event focuses on healthy sex and female empowerment
Renowned sex educators Lindsay Fram and Marshall Miller hosted “I love female orgasmThursday to discuss female anatomy, sexual health and empowerment, sponsored by American University Housing and Residence Life and other organizations.
Fram and Miller, full-time sex educators, led an informative conversation peppered with sexual innuendo and audience interaction, followed by anecdotes for sex-positive prizes.
Fram and Miller travel the country teaching comprehensive sex education and have spoken at hundreds of colleges. Fram, who has more than 15 years of experience in the sexual health field, said her goal was to close the “orgasm gap,” the phenomenon where women have fewer orgasms than men. in cisgender and heterosexual relationships.
The duo began by showing the dinner scene from “When Harry Met Sally”, to illustrate the decades-old trope that women frequently fake their orgasms.
Fram and Miller launched into a discussion of why some women fake orgasms and what myths we’ve been taught about the female orgasm. The audience of approximately 400 students sent in anonymous responses using slapan interactive app.
Such a prompt, “What have you heard of the female orgasm?” gave responses ranging from “fake news” and “urban legend” to “unbelievable” and “incredible.”
Fram said a person with a vagina takes an average of 20 minutes to orgasm, while a person with a penis takes an average of two to five minutes. This disparity likely explains the orgasm gap, which couples can overcome by communicating with each other, she said at the event.
Stressing the importance of consent, Fram and Miller said they recommend learning what your partner likes by asking questions or recording yourself during sex. Fram said those conversations can be difficult to have with a partner, but clearing up that awkwardness is why she’s a full-time sex educator.
“I think there’s so much emphasis on the risks associated with sexual activity and we so often forget to talk about why people choose to engage in sexual activity, which is for pleasure,” he said. Fram said.
Another important takeaway from the event was to not enter sex with the sole motive of making your partner cum. Fram said partners shouldn’t rush through foreplay to get to the “main event,” saying every aspect of sex should prioritize pleasure.
“Do things that might lead to an orgasm, but don’t make it the end goal,” Fram said at the event. “If it happens, great, but if it doesn’t, so is it.”
As the event focused on the vagina and clitoris, Fram and Miller noted their use of gender-neutral language. Segments of their presentation acknowledged people who are transgender and/or in same-sex relationships, as well as the possible difficulty of achieving orgasm for those taking antidepressants. They also featured illustrations of a diverse range of vulvas – unique in size, shape and color – to teach anatomy.
Angie Natoli, HRL’s community director, said she brought “I Love Female Orgasm” to UA because of her inclusiveness after seeing the event held at Towson University.
“I realized how inclusive it was and how much it normalized sex and provided a lot of sex education in a way that I thought was fun and engaging and beyond any sex ed program I ‘ve ever seen,” Natoli said.
Jordan Baker, a freshman in the School of International Service and the College of Arts and Sciences, is an Anderson Hall senator from the Residence Hall Association who helped plan the event.
“It’s really global, and when it comes to college campuses – like how endemic the hookup culture is – this event kind of brought some good clarity to the [conversation about sex]“, said Boulanger.
She added that students in the United States generally lack proper sex education before entering college.
“More [sex education classes] discuss things like protection, STDs, general things to know,” Baker said. “They never really discussed sex in a positive light or [went] so far in their education… but programs like this bring new light and a new opportunity for people to discuss things they have never had the opportunity to do.
